A lot of people in relationships have broken up due to several reasons. Read on to find out why your relationships do not last beyond a year.
1. You Unconsciously Pick Your Parents
Our brain seeks to re-create the conditions of our childhood, so that we can correct them.
This requires our romantic partners to have our caregivers’ negative traits, which means they are bound to reopen our most sensitive wounds.
In order to have a long-term relationship, we have to work together with our partner in a very conscious way to help each other heal.
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2. You Stop Being on your Best Behavior
In the beginning of a relationship we are all at our most charming, easy-going and impressive.
An important part of relationship longevity is the ability to tolerate one another’s annoying habits. These don’t tend to come out until you have been in a relationship for a year.
Eventually when you develop a real connection, you’re going to reveal your preferences, and you two may no longer be a match.
3. Milestone Pressures
Hitting that one-year milestone usually makes couples assess the relationship and plan their next step.
In addition, holidays and anniversaries can create pressure that can kill a relationship.
As a matter of fact, breakup mostly occurs both in the spring and late holiday season. These are peak breakup times due to pressure to define the relationship.
4. You don’t have good models for healthy relationships
We all like to think of ourselves as mature and intelligent decision-makers who make important life choices rationally, based on good reasoning.
But in reality, we’re all far more influenced by unconscious patterns than we like to admit.
If you’re surrounded by examples of unhealthy relationships, it’s very difficult to swim against the grain and choose a healthy one.
You have to try and change the type of people and relationships you spend time around.
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5. You gossip about your relationship
Relationships are built on trust.
Yes, it’s a cliche, but it’s a true one that we’d all do well to think more carefully about.
Specifically, it’s worth looking closely at where you tend to lose trust in relationships.
Gossiping about your relationship with third parties can lead to loss of trust and a breakup.
6. You don’t know what your values are
Knowing exactly what your values and expectations are will help to choose the right partner to guide you.
How can you expect to find a partner who’s right for you if you don’t know what’s right for you?
If you choose a partner based on values that aren’t really your own, you’ll most likely end up with a wrong partner.
